Ring Mistress
“Relationships may be more complicated than ever, but the eternal truth is, sex is—and should be—good. In order to help you get the most out of your sex life, you need advice from experts on both sides of the bed.
By Martin Downs, M.P.H., and Victoria Zdrok, Ph.D.
Q:
My girlfriend went to a sex-toy party and came home with a bag full of goodies she wants to try out. What the hell is a cock ring, and why does my girlfriend want to put one on me?
The Pet doctor: A cock ring is one of the greatest inventions in the history of sex toys. It’s a ring that’s placed around the base of the penis to slow the flow of blood from the erect penile tissue, which helps in maintaining an erection for a longer period of time. Cock rings can be worn around just the penis, or around both the penis and scrotum, or around the scrotum alone (in which case it’s called a testicle cuff). Most guys like wearing penis rings because they amplify and prolong erections and help intensify their orgasms.
Vibrating cock rings are usually pleasurable for both the wearer and his partner, and many include clitoral stimulators—which is the one I suspect your girlfriend might be pushing you to use. These stimulators can be turned around and angled to tickle anal regions as well.
For many women, a vibrating cock ring provides that extra stimulation necessary to bring them to the Big O during intercourse. I am personally very fond of the disposable cock rings with vibrating clitoral stimulators (often called one-shots) because having to wash sex toys in the afterglow diminishes the fun.
Go ahead and follow your girlfriend’s suggestion—put on that cock ring—and I’ll bet that you’ll love it. Just remember not to put it on too tight and not to leave it on for more than 30 minutes. If you feel any pain, discomfort, or coldness in your cock, it’s time to pull it off!
The Downs side: It’s funny how this is never on any of the lists of “things men should know.” Fix a flat, tie a bow tie, find north without a compass, and…use a cock ring?
It’s not the kind of thing you’d learn in the Boy Scouts, but it’s definitely worth knowing.
Of course, you understand that, to get an erection, your penis becomes engorged with blood. A cock ring fitted around the base of your penis lets blood flow in, but keeps it from flowing back out. Trapping more blood in the penis gives you a bigger, harder erection.
If your girlfriend wants you to try on a cock ring, it’s as much for your benefit as it is hers. You might last longer and have more explosive orgasms when using it. But a super swollen member may be extra sensitive, so you might find that using a cock ring makes you come more quickly. You also might not feel anything special, or it might be altogether annoying. Results can vary.
A cock ring is frequently meant to be worn around the whole package—under the balls and over the shaft. A typical cock ring is a stretchy silicone band. To put one on, start limp, or with a chubby. The balls go through the ring first, then the penis. Make the ring snug around the base of your cock and balls.
Other cock-ring varieties include adjustable straps that fasten with snaps or Velcro, and simple cords.
There are solid-metal cock rings, too, but those are not recommended for beginners. As a general rule, keep a cock ring on for no more than 30 minutes at a time, or you’ll risk permanent damage to your penis.
Have you ever lamented being second-best to your lady’s vibrating toy? Maybe you like the feeling of vibration during sex, but don’t like the clumsiness of a handheld vibrator? You can buy cock rings with a little “bullet” vibe attachment, as well as various patented designs that add multipronged, vibrating functionality.
It would help to road test your cock ring to see how it feels. Masturbate with it on before trying it with your girlfriend. If you like it, add it to your
gear; if not, use it to organize your electronics cables.
Now, would someone please teach me how to tie a bow tie?
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